Well, then...

My family had the family birthday party for me, Peanut, and Mom today. Since we all have birthdays in October, we all get the same party. Whoopie.

As you know, I come from a family of nutjobs, so what happened was pretty odd for anyone sane to comprehend.

I'm telling you for the last time, NO ONE in my family is on drugs. I think that clears things up for you.

Now on to the stuff I feel like writing about!

On Friday, the most recent day that I had Art, something funny happened. Since we just finished our last project, we were having a bit of free time today. We were still forced to sit in our assigned seats. Drat.

My assigned seat is next to Mr. President(have I told you about him yet?), and Slush came over to talk to him. Apparently, they both have put off doing their outside-class project off until now, even though it's due Wednesday. I can't really blame them. I have, too.

The project is to take an old masterpiece (Mona Lisa, The Scream, etc.)and redraw it into something modern, like giving them an ipod.

So they were both completely clueless as to what they should draw. They sat there for ever, just coming up with stupid ideas that would earn them both Fs. Finally, they asked me what I was going to draw.

I hadn't come up with anything, so I told them the first thing that came out of my head, I was going to draw a talkshow with Mona Lisa AND The Scream. I was surprised by the ingenious of the out-of-the-blue idea. They were, too.

Slush asked me if I was actually going to use that idea. I told him, "If I can come up with a -spur-of-the-moment ingenious thing like that, do you really think I'm going to give it away that easily?" He stared at me and said, "Did you really just come up with that on the spot?"

I said yes, and he said, "Aww, I was thinking that if you were joking, I would do that." I spent the rest of the period comforting him. Wasted time. Seriously. I mean, I was drawing caterpillars until then! See? Absolutely wasted.

Sayonara!

It worked!

Hurrah! What I said worked!! So well, in fact, I'll tell you something funny!

I somehow ended up saying an entire Shakespeare MONOLOGUE that I didn't even know I knew, which belongs to Helena from A Midsummer Night's Dream. Here it is.

HELENA: How happy some o'er other some can be!

Through Athens I am thought as fair as she.

But what of that? Demetrius thinks not so;

He will not know what all but he do know.

And as he errs, doting on Hermia's eyes,

So I, admiring of his qualities.

Things base and vile, holding no quantity,

Love can transpose to form and dignity.

Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,

And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.

Nor hath Love's mind of any judgment taste;

Wings, and no eyes, figure unheedy haste.

And therefore is Love said to be a child,

Because in choice he is so oft beguiled.

As waggish boys in game themselves forswear,

So the boy Love is perjured everywhere.

For ere Demetrius looked on Hermia's eyne,

He hailed down oaths that he was only mine;

And when this hail some heat from Hermia felt,

So he dissolved, and show'rs of oaths did melt.

I will go tell him of fair Hermia's flight.

Then to the wood will he to-morrow night

Pursue her; and for this intelligence

If I have thanks, it is a dear expense.

But herein mean I to enrich my pain,

To have his sight thither and back again.

Yeah, Sir Limey Pants sure backed off after that. If ever you need to turn down a lime, bring out the Helena inside.

Now for the funny thing! If you go to Google and type in "find Chuck Norris," and click I'm feeling lucky, something REALLY funny shows up! I'm serious! Do it!

Sayonara!

What I will do.

I know what I'll say to him. I will ask myself, "What would Shakespeare do?" Then go up to him and spout off the first Shakespeare quote I can think of.

I'm hoping it's either "Alas, poor Yorick," from Hamlet, or "Out, damn spot, out, I say!" from Macbeth. They both seem like rejection sentences(Well, not really in the case of 'Yorick,' but I really want to say that for some reason).

Sayonara!

A major FLUB.

Well, that was a major flub. I was putting my script away after play rehearsal when Sir(not) Limey Pants walked up and asked for my answer. Doggone it, why is he in the play too?

The zipper on my backpack was being really stupid, so I was very distracted(once again) and said the completely wrong answer.

I said what I'd say to a boy I'd like. I said that I had to consult my friends first.

Now it sounds like I actually like him, but am afraid to go out with him. Fear is far from my number one priority. I must make him think I'm not intimidated. I am fearless.

Now, what am I going to do? The zipper on my backpack's broken, AND I've got a (not)limey boy who thinks I like him. I don't think I can get through another day under his (not) limey gaze.

Slush looked oddly lost today. It seems that without his (not) limey entourage, he is very upset. His locker is right next to mine, so I should know.

Maybe he's limey instead! Maybe they're all secretly limey except for Sir (not) Limey Pants and all of those boys who have girlfriends!

NERVY SPAZ!!! NERVY SPAZ!!! THE NERVY SPAZ TO END ALL NERVY SPAZZES!!!

Sayonara(twitch)!

My Birthday

Well then, I know this is way too late, but Now for my birthday post!

At my party, we had a bubble eating contest. Yeah, that was interesting.

Now for the stuff I actually remember!

Sir Limey Pants can no longer be called that. In fact, it's true what he said about not being gay.

He asked me out during Math class. While we were having a test. It's first period. Evidently, I wasn't expecting it at all. In fact, I wasn't even paying attention to him. So I said 'maybe.'

I think I'll go douse myself in water to cool off my feverish melon.

I should have thought this through. Now I'm entering a Wisconsin winter with self-inflicted hypothermia. At least now I don't have to deal with a certain(not) limey bastard.

JK. Drat.

Anyway, despite my bizarrely non-limey morning, at my after school picnic, Twins, TWWOTF, Penguin, Bonita, and I were all huddling against the cold, like, as Penguin would say, penguins.

A sudden blast of wind came along and drove all of our skirts crazy. Only Penguin and I didn't mind, we just laughed and shouted, "Down, Skirty, down!"

The Insane Trio has a new song entirely dedicated to this incident.

Sayonara!

A Severe Lack of Dry Pants.

I think the title can explain pretty thoroughly why I have been unable to post for like, ever. NO, I'm not serious. The title is a joke.

I haven't posted because I don't have the time.

My birthday party is tomorrow. I have invited Spoilsport, Penguin, Kitty and TWWOTF. Yes, it's small. But that's because I have a lot of cramming to do before I turn thirteen.

I have not yet tried the diet coke and mentos experiment. I have not yet done the Gertrude Dance under the moonlight. I have not yet held a TWAH (I'll tell you that after the party) ceremony.

I have started working on my new story, though. I don't know what I'll call it yet, but here's two of the characters, the ones that are focused on in the first book.

First off, this is about another country in another world, and how the capital city of that country makes everyone else suffer. There are twelve main characters, and each one gets half of a book to themselves over the course of six books, and the seventh switches off between each of them. These twelve were predicted to become the ones who would save the country from the brutal capital.

Kae of Tii; From the capital herself, it was known from a young age that she was not quite normal. She only eats what she needs, no more, and has no taste for the processed yet exquisite delicacies that are developed in Tii. The daughter of the president of the nation, she has one friend, Lily of Tii, who harbors the same hatred of Tii, but masks it much better. Lily means a lot to her. The night before she turns fourteen (which is supposedly the most important age to a girl of this country, like our thirteen or sixteen), she runs away from her home city, and flees south to try and help the impoverished city of Aire find a way to rise against Tii. Born on November 28th.

Cla of Aire; From the most impoverished and criminally active city in this nation, Cla has a hatred of Tii that goes much deeper than anyone else's; When she was eight, she was mugged by fellow Aires for a snapper that she had very luckily caught(as Aire is a city of fishmongers and traders). When her first and only sign of help comes in the form of a visiting Tii girl, she begs for help, because she knows she will die if left untreated. The Tii girl freezes in place until her father shows up and kicks Cla in the face. What hurts the most to Cla is the fact that she could see that the Tii girl had wanted to help her, but had allowed her father to hurt Cla further. She ended up saved by a boy from the neighboring city of Ra, which is the the most intelligent city in the nation, who was able to perform emergency surgery and then bfriend Cla while she was recovering. Cla later vowed to kill the Tii girl that she met that day, who is later revealed to be Kae. Born on May 26th.

Scary, huh? Cla befriends Kae later, but never forgets that incident. Will she carry out her vow or give into friendship? The world may never know...

Sayonara!

Comics!

I have no homework, so I'm gonna post more of my photoshopped comics here. I'm experimenting with different formats, so they'll all look a bit different. Please tell me which is easiest to read.

As for Penguin's Halloween costume, the majority of you will support her decision; She is going as Mademoiselle Porn Star, Robin.

Now, for this first one, I didn't like the format because it is very time-consuming, and yet it still didn't look any good.







This is the next episode. Enjoy!

This was a little less time consuming, though it still isn't quite the result I want. It's better than the last one, though.

In case you're wondering, yes, Sven is a fictional character. I don't have a boyfriend in real life, though, according to TWWOTF's recent "prediction," I will soon. Ugh.

Dinnertime! Sayonara!